I'VE BEEN SERVED

My Daily Journal in Federal Prison

Day 4

I took a shower today.  It was my first since surrendering on Tuesday.  Gross, right?  Let me explain.  You are offered no change of clothes in “the Hole.”  And I don’t know about you, but nothing gives me the heebie jeebies more than putting on dirty clothes after taking a shower.  It’s not like I’m breaking all kinds of sweat lying around all day doing nothing…but…I WAS smelling kind of ripe and I had my appointment with the Doc today — I wasn’t about to let a little thing like hygiene prevent me from getting medical clearance.  Oh, and let me clarify…you get a change of clothes on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday…so the clothes that I was putting on today were clean.

And so much for solitary confinement.  Shortly after lunch, the little slot in the door opened.  Since I wasn’t expecting any meals, I assumed that it was time to get cuffed as the Doc was finally here.  However, as they opened the door it became clear that I wasn’t going anywhere…but someone else was coming in.  And in walked an exact replica of Tony “Tiny” Lister (search Google Images if necessary).  What’s funny is that he seemed to object to MY presence more than I objected to his…and I was there first!  He was already demanding a spray bottle & rag to clean up the place.  (I keep a very tidy crib, thank you.)

In hindsight, I was just grateful that I took a shower earlier.  Had I known that I was going to have a sleepover guest, I would have also taken the opportunity to use the bathroom.

Eventually, I was able to see the Doc (or, at least, whom I thought was the Doc) and while the results of my vitals were positive…her overall message was not.  For some reason, she was under the impression that I would have to stay under watch for 2 WEEKS and then stay in “the Hole” further until bed space opens.  Hopefully, this won’t be the case as I was pretty excited to be getting out of here on Monday.  While I can definitely take care of myself and find ways to pass the time, I was more concerned about my loved ones not knowing of my whereabouts.

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